I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.