Texts From Last Night · xPvTxSkItTlEs's Favorites

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xPvTxSkItTlEs's Favorites Texts:

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.

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(425): View more from Washington

I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.

Fav 0 1196 750
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(407): View more from Florida

It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.

Fav 2 1681 875
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(304): View more from West Virginia

Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(563): View more from Iowa

You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.

Fav 7 2519 1043
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(614): View more from Ohio

We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid

Fav 12 2028 1032
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.

Fav 22 4789 941
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(425): View more from Washington

Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?

Fav 1 1030 1621
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