Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.