I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.