Texts From Last Night · Paxl's Favorites

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Paxl's Favorites Texts:

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?

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(305): View more from Florida

I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.

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(305): View more from Florida

I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"

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(936): View more from Texas

Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.

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(425): View more from Washington

I proposed and she said yes man.

(1-425): View more from Washington

You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?

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(972): View more from Texas

they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!

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(216): View more from Ohio

somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.

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