Texts From Last Night

BomBSquaD's Favorites Texts:

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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Holy shit r u serious? How?

  (440): View more from Ohio

  Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.

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  (216): Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks. (440): Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf? (216): Holy shit r u serious? How? (440): Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you. http://tfl.nu/xwoo
  Replies (156) Good night (6142) Bad night (39422)
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  (949): View more from California

  Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?

  (1-949): View more from California

  are you seriously doing this over text message

  (949): View more from California

  hahaha no, but i am dumping you.

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  (949): Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me? (1-949): are you seriously doing this over text message (949): hahaha no, but i am dumping you. http://tfl.nu/2zd7
  Replies (351) Good night (7017) Bad night (46835)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  just caught grandpa beating off in the living room

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  (619): just caught grandpa beating off in the living room http://tfl.nu/3g7q
  Replies (127) Good night (6875) Bad night (59105) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  happy early fathers day!!!

  (829): View more from Dominican Rep

  im not a father

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  about that...

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  (843): happy early fathers day!!! (829): im not a father (843): about that... http://tfl.nu/tk4z
  Replies (221) Good night (6514) Bad night (70155)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.

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  (310): ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude. http://tfl.nu/5a88
  Replies (174) Good night (5431) Bad night (77617) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.

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  (405): I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed. http://tfl.nu/abj9
  Replies (7) Good night (746) Bad night (4374) Order T-Shirt
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock

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  (812): This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock http://tfl.nu/gdx6
  Replies (16) Good night (641) Bad night (4696) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.

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  (406): He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine. http://tfl.nu/2wf3
  Replies (11) Good night (1025) Bad night (2771) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!

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  (435): he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?! http://tfl.nu/3uuq
  Replies (18) Good night (952) Bad night (3378) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.

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  (850): If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me. http://tfl.nu/s2pe
  Replies (20) Good night (1199) Bad night (4476) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.

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  (780): Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks. http://tfl.nu/2lc5
  Replies (11) Good night (6028) Bad night (690) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.

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  (707): He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/ve7z
  Replies (21) Good night (6842) Bad night (675) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7

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  (207): I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7 http://tfl.nu/thj7
  Replies (14) Good night (5813) Bad night (544) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion

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  (856): Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion http://tfl.nu/nnpe
  Replies (7) Good night (3149) Bad night (481) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.

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  (256): Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary. http://tfl.nu/t36d
  Replies (3) Good night (2127) Bad night (487) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.

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  (973): I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night. http://tfl.nu/b0w0
  Replies (4) Good night (2069) Bad night (907) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.

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  (407): I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight. http://tfl.nu/a28b
  Replies (9) Good night (2638) Bad night (614) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Are we going out tonight?

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  My conscience says no but my vag says yes

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  (920): Are we going out tonight? (414): My conscience says no but my vag says yes http://tfl.nu/5n9j
  Replies (7) Good night (2574) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY

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  (760): BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY http://tfl.nu/9dad
  Replies (3) Good night (2278) Bad night (353) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children

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  (312): please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children http://tfl.nu/5h1t
  Replies (8) Good night (1539) Bad night (554) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?

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  (580): I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight? http://tfl.nu/jndw
  Replies (1) Good night (1863) Bad night (370) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  So squirting runs in the family.

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  (603): So squirting runs in the family. http://tfl.nu/x29o
  Replies (15) Good night (3526) Bad night (1110) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake

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  (315): i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake http://tfl.nu/sp6n
  Replies (8) Good night (2453) Bad night (493) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.

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  (310): Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate. http://tfl.nu/vwb7
  Replies (9) Good night (5061) Bad night (552) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.

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  (813): Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b. http://tfl.nu/ahce
  Replies (17) Good night (3697) Bad night (1409) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+35): View more from

  Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?

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  (+35): Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck? http://tfl.nu/h4m7
  Replies (5) Good night (2006) Bad night (359) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.

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  (217): You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice. http://tfl.nu/09lg
  Replies (4) Good night (3036) Bad night (776) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though

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  (406): I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though http://tfl.nu/qgj2
  Replies (1) Good night (1350) Bad night (528) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king

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  (571): I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king http://tfl.nu/c906
  Replies (8) Good night (1653) Bad night (400) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.

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  (510): I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper. http://tfl.nu/fogv
  Replies (6) Good night (1360) Bad night (580) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.

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  (775): I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex. http://tfl.nu/bvr1
  Replies (18) Good night (5348) Bad night (673) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?

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  (310): Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on? http://tfl.nu/pffh
  Replies (54) Good night (9445) Bad night (642) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.

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  (732): That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS. http://tfl.nu/7vfy
  Replies (10) Good night (9123) Bad night (689) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.

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  (321): I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it. http://tfl.nu/0ggm
  Replies (37) Good night (12488) Bad night (800) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.

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  (901): I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck. http://tfl.nu/z7fe
  Replies (21) Good night (7866) Bad night (593)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free

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  (734): It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free http://tfl.nu/3j31
  Replies (8) Good night (4076) Bad night (1148) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?

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  (916): craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in? http://tfl.nu/76bu
  Replies (16) Good night (8008) Bad night (791) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor

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  (510): Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor http://tfl.nu/56ek
  Replies (5) Good night (2896) Bad night (564) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom

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  (207): you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom http://tfl.nu/am8n
  Replies (11) Good night (5036) Bad night (515) Order T-Shirt
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.

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  (478): We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out. http://tfl.nu/tea7
  Replies (14) Good night (7390) Bad night (1242) Order T-Shirt
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  (646): View more from New York

  He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.

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  (646): He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was. http://tfl.nu/uwpx
  Replies (24) Good night (818) Bad night (5340) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate

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  (941): sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate http://tfl.nu/n9pe
  Replies (7) Good night (3594) Bad night (1097) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it

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  (330): beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it http://tfl.nu/hhxp
  Replies (5) Good night (2773) Bad night (907) Order T-Shirt
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.

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  (270): she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah. http://tfl.nu/1uyt
  Replies (30) Good night (9082) Bad night (813) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...

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  (315): My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships... http://tfl.nu/1r9u
  Replies (42) Good night (2884) Bad night (6376) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?

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  (908): how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer? http://tfl.nu/a07e
  Replies (20) Good night (6115) Bad night (674) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...

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  (425): I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results... http://tfl.nu/tn0b
  Replies (14) Good night (827) Bad night (7473) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.

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  (281): It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms. http://tfl.nu/ibyd
  Replies (13) Good night (4927) Bad night (630) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.

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  (631): I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form. http://tfl.nu/sx5m
  Replies (13) Good night (3584) Bad night (692) Order T-Shirt
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  (305): View more from Florida

  Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.

  (786): View more from Florida

  How high are you right now..

  (305): View more from Florida

  I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.

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  (305): Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind. (786): How high are you right now.. (305): I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT. http://tfl.nu/q5i7
  Replies (29) Good night (9723) Bad night (733)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.

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  (214): Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever. http://tfl.nu/p67s
  Replies (178) Good night (82689) Bad night (2374) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!

  (269): View more from Michigan

  ...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...

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  (734): those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion! (269): ...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone... http://tfl.nu/zhx6
  Replies (9) Good night (517) Bad night (1980)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"

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  (864): So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life" http://tfl.nu/u5wp
  Replies (171) Good night (49208) Bad night (5110)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  I told you I was good to drive

  (1-915): View more from Texas

  dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate

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  (915): I told you I was good to drive (1-915): dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate http://tfl.nu/7qaj
  Replies (52) Good night (68149) Bad night (1686) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."

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  (757): At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP." http://tfl.nu/p091
  Replies (292) Good night (69180) Bad night (1982) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I'm fucking your sister right now.

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  You motherfucker

  (813): View more from Florida

  She's next.

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  (813): I'm fucking your sister right now. (1-813): You motherfucker (813): She's next. http://tfl.nu/gaup
  Replies (151) Good night (62665) Bad night (2950)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

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  (215): i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section http://tfl.nu/5gr0
  Replies (1608) Good night (161221) Bad night (40082) Order T-Shirt
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  (714): View more from California

  Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful

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  (714): Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful http://tfl.nu/3flc
  Replies (30) Good night (6647) Bad night (1039) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  How am I a tease?

  (1-813): View more from Florida

  Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.

  (813): View more from Florida

  ONLY PART OF IT.

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  (813): How am I a tease? (1-813): Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away. (813): ONLY PART OF IT. http://tfl.nu/b7xa
  Replies (44) Good night (7972) Bad night (1298)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?

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  (847): Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden? http://tfl.nu/x4ab
  Replies (110) Good night (11816) Bad night (1088) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.

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  (401): like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY. http://tfl.nu/lkyy
  Replies (9) Good night (852) Bad night (4765)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.

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  (502): bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story. http://tfl.nu/l5v1
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".

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  (401): My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets". http://tfl.nu/hqdk
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.

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  (832): The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went. http://tfl.nu/fpvf
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it

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  (732): yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it http://tfl.nu/reim
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance

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  (336): i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance http://tfl.nu/wpko
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