Texts From Last Night · AJBitner's Favorites

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AJBitner's Favorites Texts:

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(586): View more from Michigan

You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go

Fav 1 29 37
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(214): View more from Texas

I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.

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(251): View more from Alabama

dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(512): View more from Texas

The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.

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(205): View more from Alabama

WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES

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(609): View more from New Jersey

I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key

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