Texts From Last Night · sparky9365's Favorites

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sparky9365's Favorites Texts:

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(518): View more from New York

The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties

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(586): View more from Michigan

I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk

Fav 1 381 164
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(801): View more from Utah

My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.

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(949): View more from California

Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(773): View more from Illinois

ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!

Fav 3 478 1673
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(407): View more from Florida

I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.

Fav 14 1164 591
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(701): View more from North Dakota

Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.

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(818): View more from California

Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.

Fav 3 1448 605
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