Texts From Last Night

Rider62490's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?" http://tfl.nu/ut0z
  Replies (8) Good night (1097) Bad night (3583) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts

  (1-412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Am I supposed to find that romantic?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts (1-412): Am I supposed to find that romantic? http://tfl.nu/carb
  Replies (19) Good night (6645) Bad night (2315)
• Favorite

  (226): View more from Ontario

  This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (226): This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon http://tfl.nu/4pbx
  Replies (43) Good night (13813) Bad night (1927) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba" http://tfl.nu/uoap
  Replies (833) Good night (142126) Bad night (9307) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (906): If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her? http://tfl.nu/jtlb
  Replies (10) Good night (2912) Bad night (1358) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY http://tfl.nu/b20j
  Replies (14) Good night (6665) Bad night (1127) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried. http://tfl.nu/h9l8
  Replies (17) Good night (1983) Bad night (4190) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky. http://tfl.nu/5xyb
  Replies (31) Good night (14740) Bad night (1575) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong http://tfl.nu/v2kj
  Replies (25) Good night (1160) Bad night (5276) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS! http://tfl.nu/o380
  Replies (49) Good night (3051) Bad night (5015) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (979): We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it. http://tfl.nu/1cxu
  Replies (26) Good night (7407) Bad night (1057) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie http://tfl.nu/6pmw
  Replies (5) Good night (1151) Bad night (3120) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on. http://tfl.nu/o94m
  Replies (15) Good night (4466) Bad night (1192) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance. http://tfl.nu/bz9b
  Replies (14) Good night (1202) Bad night (4134) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen. http://tfl.nu/1m72
  Replies (47) Good night (11511) Bad night (2161) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me. http://tfl.nu/3m0w
  Replies (20) Good night (1363) Bad night (6567) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS. http://tfl.nu/pf4u
  Replies (58) Good night (14607) Bad night (1479) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter http://tfl.nu/eba3
  Replies (36) Good night (1834) Bad night (5500) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus. http://tfl.nu/fd89
  Replies (19) Good night (7161) Bad night (979) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties. http://tfl.nu/3p0b
  Replies (32) Good night (7540) Bad night (992) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone http://tfl.nu/f58w
  Replies (20) Good night (5311) Bad night (1093) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker http://tfl.nu/yzaq
  Replies (25) Good night (6297) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka http://tfl.nu/p67g
  Replies (13) Good night (875) Bad night (5573) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"? http://tfl.nu/3j2r
  Replies (32) Good night (16977) Bad night (1199) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks" http://tfl.nu/zxub
  Replies (32) Good night (7056) Bad night (2051) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (915): Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches" http://tfl.nu/07la
  Replies (17) Good night (6346) Bad night (1600) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you. http://tfl.nu/z9fg
  Replies (34) Good night (1077) Bad night (13107) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone. http://tfl.nu/g122
  Replies (24) Good night (8833) Bad night (902)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.

  (1-410): View more from Maryland

  I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube. (1-410): I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds. http://tfl.nu/szhm
  Replies (13) Good night (4710) Bad night (765) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (562): the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon... http://tfl.nu/do0i
  Replies (94) Good night (20298) Bad night (1694)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?

  (1-727): View more from Florida

  I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think? (1-727): I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again. http://tfl.nu/gesf
  Replies (32) Good night (2569) Bad night (4421)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding http://tfl.nu/pa6f
  Replies (21) Good night (6877) Bad night (853) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck http://tfl.nu/mnqh
  Replies (49) Good night (1147) Bad night (7140) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas. http://tfl.nu/b72z
  Replies (31) Good night (11835) Bad night (1125) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (352): I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way. http://tfl.nu/qonl
  Replies (34) Good night (5924) Bad night (2085) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina. (614): Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money http://tfl.nu/rx4e
  Replies (27) Good night (6657) Bad night (1282)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk! http://tfl.nu/z1cd
  Replies (27) Good night (9065) Bad night (3963) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox http://tfl.nu/t30w
  Replies (38) Good night (8261) Bad night (919) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier. http://tfl.nu/o9ed
  Replies (19) Good night (9097) Bad night (1274)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (647): she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready' http://tfl.nu/8jmk
  Replies (17) Good night (3638) Bad night (1487) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face. http://tfl.nu/bthr
  Replies (42) Good night (3595) Bad night (8913) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts. http://tfl.nu/8v61
  Replies (16) Good night (765) Bad night (6140) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room.. http://tfl.nu/dpny
  Replies (17) Good night (5657) Bad night (966) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out? http://tfl.nu/q9ps
  Replies (37) Good night (8519) Bad night (2906) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"? http://tfl.nu/n4zp
  Replies (22) Good night (1209) Bad night (7416) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time. http://tfl.nu/9x69
  Replies (14) Good night (1614) Bad night (4051) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for http://tfl.nu/dk1d
  Replies (24) Good night (1125) Bad night (4037) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions. http://tfl.nu/pgpr
  Replies (16) Good night (5744) Bad night (866) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  wanna hang out tonight and remember it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): wanna hang out tonight and remember it? http://tfl.nu/5q3c
  Replies (18) Good night (5959) Bad night (1514) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize. http://tfl.nu/694m
  Replies (8) Good night (4293) Bad night (894) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again. http://tfl.nu/ocrt
  Replies (67) Good night (8004) Bad night (2174)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet." http://tfl.nu/s1m4
  Replies (52) Good night (15849) Bad night (1580) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high. http://tfl.nu/38z6
  Replies (24) Good night (4241) Bad night (904) Order T-Shirt