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  • Submitted by K66Aggression on Sep 30, 10 at 3:40pm

    this whore level just pounded off the fucking charts. all puns intended

    • Submitted by lalalalalalala on Oct 1, 10 at 3:22am

      hey nothing wrong with wanting to get laid! bad idea to start the text with "this is a mass text" though. not the most appealing way to start your request for sex.

  • Submitted by RAAAAAAAANDY on Sep 30, 10 at 3:45pm

    I was first in line. I hope the other 100 guys don't mind herpes.

    • Submitted by schlock on Sep 30, 10 at 6:40pm

      Are you saying this based on the assumption that the texter is a girl or a homosexual male?

    • Submitted by Saibot on Sep 30, 10 at 7:21pm

      Or just a normal dude?

  • Submitted by iblowpops on Sep 30, 10 at 5:55pm

    For the discerning birthday girl who wants to be so full of cum she squishes when she walks.

  • Submitted by jk440 on Sep 30, 10 at 3:40pm

    ''...time slots start at noon and are every 5 minutes''

  • Submitted by dbell930 on Sep 30, 10 at 3:36pm

    Haha stealing this idea

  • Submitted by damn_gurl on Sep 30, 10 at 3:38pm

    PS- Both boys and girls allowed.

  • Submitted by MasterK on Sep 30, 10 at 3:49pm

    Lol if it were only that easy...

  • Submitted by 2144571774 on Sep 30, 10 at 8:26pm

    If this is a guy, GENIUS! if it's a girl, can I reserve a 4 hour block? I'll be practicing my tongue pushups while I wait to hear back from you

    • Submitted by thebatman on Oct 1, 10 at 12:44pm

      feel free to tongue the girl. personally, after she already had sex with multiple guys that day, I think I'd pass on the oral. Unless you're a gh3y.

  • Submitted by EmmaXxX on Sep 30, 10 at 6:53pm

    Just realised what to do for my birthday... :)

  • Submitted by siskipedia on Sep 30, 10 at 5:42pm

    This is all kinds of win

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 10 at 3:36pm

    First day sex

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 10 at 5:07pm

    3:49 - it is!!!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 30, 10 at 11:10pm

    This is why we have AIDS.

    • Submitted by lalalalalalala on Oct 1, 10 at 3:23am

      actually we have aids because someone fucked a monkey.

      • Submitted by urallstupid on Oct 1, 10 at 8:42am

        Not gonna point any fingers, but the person wasnt white.

        • Submitted by Lancaster on Oct 1, 10 at 10:21am

          Hmm... If we have learned anything, it's that it probably was NOT a person of color. The Tuskegee experiment; our gov't injecting Guatemalans... And that's just the ones we know of. So... Your assertion is not a given.

  • Submitted by morningwood on Sep 30, 10 at 6:00pm

    Not available in the morning?

  • Submitted by jetsjetsjets on Sep 30, 10 at 4:02pm

    dids on noon

  • Submitted by warren3224 on Sep 30, 10 at 5:43pm

    What's the last slot.. I want that one

  • Submitted by SMDB on Oct 1, 10 at 3:17am

    Wow emma, your my hero. Just let me know and I will start you off. 

  • Submitted by tsoptsrif on Sep 30, 10 at 4:02pm

    What if he's g@y? ITB FTW!

  • Submitted by all_nighter on Sep 30, 10 at 8:05pm

    im sorry but that just sounds painful. sex ALL day?

  • Submitted by EmG101 on Oct 1, 10 at 3:13pm

    He/she has to look like george clooney/ Megan fox to get away with that

  • Submitted by catface on Oct 2, 10 at 10:15am

    Well that is an ontario area code

  • Submitted by HeadbangingBabe on Sep 30, 10 at 3:41pm

    Fake...but better to be a fake whore than a real whore, I suppose.

  • Submitted by archer79 on Oct 1, 10 at 10:13am

    Wood, of course not available in morning! OP's gotta rest!

  • Submitted by frootyboom8 on Sep 30, 10 at 11:37pm

    MasterK for some of us it is!

  • Submitted by lostinadream on Oct 1, 10 at 11:47am

    Sounds painful... Just saying...

  • Submitted by dumbdumb on Oct 1, 10 at 1:47am

    RAAAAAAAANDY-so nice of you to share your STDs.

  • Submitted by bkerwin on Oct 2, 10 at 12:48pm

    And this is a prime example of why the Maury show is still on tv trying to figure out who the baby's daddy is. No objections though, go get it!

  • Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 2, 10 at 12:23pm

    Wow... It would be like throwing a hotdog down a hallway if it's a chick... Remember boys and girls, herpes is the gift that keeps on giving!

  • Submitted by generic_name on Oct 1, 10 at 12:28am

    gross

  • Submitted by Qiana2005 on Sep 30, 10 at 6:50pm

    Ummmm ok me too! 

  • 81 86
    Submitted by Andikins on Apr 11, 11 at 4:31am

    Holy shit! Nice.

  • Submitted by AlbinoBlackSheep on Oct 1, 10 at 3:44pm

    Megan Fox< Shit\nJust accept it, she's a dirty slut who is probaby so loose you could stick your dick inside of her and all you'd feel is air.

  • Submitted by SALIA on Oct 1, 10 at 12:22am

    More like 'sluts begin at noon'...geesh. I hope one of the other presents is a Plan B, or two.