Texts From Last Night · aaronm's Favorites

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aaronm's Favorites Texts:

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(732): View more from New Jersey

come over i need a lifeguard for my shower

Fav 29 10132 1778
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(310): View more from California

ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.

Fav 175 7667 81653
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(712): View more from Iowa

My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!

Fav 34 7091 1640
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(319): View more from Iowa

On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?

(316): View more from Kansas

Toaster

Fav 48 26744 2044
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(919): View more from North Carolina

My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.

Fav 68 18776 1864
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(518): View more from New York

I hraet yuo

(862): View more from New Jersey

did you say you heart me or hate me?

(518): View more from New York

who is this?

Fav 18 4114 1215
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.

Fav 11 1677 825
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(409): View more from Texas

He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'

Fav 15 5813 1566
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