Texts From Last Night

kingextreme's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met

  (1-319): View more from Iowa

  thanks it was an honor just to be nominated

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met (1-319): thanks it was an honor just to be nominated http://tfl.nu/yswc
  Replies (37) Good night (10698) Bad night (831) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket? http://tfl.nu/lptb
  Replies (48) Good night (1557) Bad night (7138) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table

  (1-256): View more from Alabama

  whatd she say to you?

  (256): View more from Alabama

  no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table (1-256): whatd she say to you? (256): no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle http://tfl.nu/mg7u
  Replies (60) Good night (1865) Bad night (8175)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning. http://tfl.nu/luil
  Replies (65) Good night (1218) Bad night (6734) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?

  (1-613): View more from Ontario

  not a thing

  (613): View more from Ontario

  walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom? (1-613): not a thing (613): walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom http://tfl.nu/euwx
  Replies (19) Good night (837) Bad night (5029)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  I just woke up to me licking the dognuts

  (623): View more from Arizona

  You mean Doughnuts?

  (602): View more from Arizona

  ......No :(

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (602): I just woke up to me licking the dognuts (623): You mean Doughnuts? (602): ......No :( http://tfl.nu/8azm
  Replies (50) Good night (1176) Bad night (17174)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks http://tfl.nu/rdtc
  Replies (50) Good night (7008) Bad night (1030)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.

  (1405): View more from

  I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie. (1405): I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes? http://tfl.nu/u9sc
  Replies (47) Good night (10020) Bad night (850) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (563): Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade http://tfl.nu/sv7y
  Replies (63) Good night (56992) Bad night (1220)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you. http://tfl.nu/3bx1
  Replies (13) Good night (707) Bad night (4184) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (386): he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor" http://tfl.nu/h9m9
  Replies (26) Good night (1150) Bad night (5307) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me. http://tfl.nu/n11o
  Replies (46) Good night (2215) Bad night (7923)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?

  (1-949): View more from California

  are you seriously doing this over text message

  (949): View more from California

  hahaha no, but i am dumping you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me? (1-949): are you seriously doing this over text message (949): hahaha no, but i am dumping you. http://tfl.nu/2zd7
  Replies (353) Good night (7745) Bad night (48313)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor http://tfl.nu/0k04
  Replies (17) Good night (886) Bad night (4732) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out. http://tfl.nu/ndw1
  Replies (50) Good night (1433) Bad night (18292)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face http://tfl.nu/cojx
  Replies (60) Good night (1694) Bad night (7449) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back

  (914): View more from New York

  that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back (914): that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart http://tfl.nu/d09e
  Replies (102) Good night (1525) Bad night (5359)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends. http://tfl.nu/iv37
  Replies (45) Good night (11635) Bad night (1240) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks. http://tfl.nu/p2ad
  Replies (25) Good night (4589) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook http://tfl.nu/tp82
  Replies (24) Good night (1822) Bad night (10051) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them http://tfl.nu/zf3d
  Replies (209) Good night (61980) Bad night (2276) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?

  (516): View more from New York

  you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain? (516): you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food." http://tfl.nu/33sl
  Replies (67) Good night (11422) Bad night (1193)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life http://tfl.nu/pj1v
  Replies (16) Good night (7559) Bad night (676) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  "Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): "Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had. http://tfl.nu/szr3
  Replies (61) Good night (860) Bad night (10794) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom... http://tfl.nu/aduc
  Replies (80) Good night (926) Bad night (6305) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (907): It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am. http://tfl.nu/0rxk
  Replies (36) Good night (957) Bad night (5476) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do. http://tfl.nu/xze3
  Replies (22) Good night (8760) Bad night (1089) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months. http://tfl.nu/uiec
  Replies (28) Good night (841) Bad night (5164) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet. http://tfl.nu/znp0
  Replies (48) Good night (10246) Bad night (988) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier? http://tfl.nu/2449
  Replies (183) Good night (5133) Bad night (6823) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker" http://tfl.nu/30jj
  Replies (44) Good night (17879) Bad night (923)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  What did u do?

  (540): View more from Virginia

  turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn.. (1-540): What did u do? (540): turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him.. http://tfl.nu/pi8a
  Replies (50) Good night (11034) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?

  (720): View more from Colorado

  This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win? (720): This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok? http://tfl.nu/drjm
  Replies (98) Good night (2598) Bad night (5649)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (941): so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation. http://tfl.nu/o6ey
  Replies (41) Good night (724) Bad night (10150)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity http://tfl.nu/4zrt
  Replies (44) Good night (15224) Bad night (1086) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door. http://tfl.nu/090e
  Replies (29) Good night (2068) Bad night (6870) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...

  (1-913): View more from Kansas

  What?!

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom... (1-913): What?! (913): Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!! http://tfl.nu/4m0s
  Replies (35) Good night (864) Bad night (8809)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that. (717): I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother... http://tfl.nu/ehm3
  Replies (153) Good night (1890) Bad night (25535)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again http://tfl.nu/9mpp
  Replies (34) Good night (6238) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud http://tfl.nu/p0vi
  Replies (44) Good night (1436) Bad night (18551) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (269): I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week. http://tfl.nu/9ao4
  Replies (33) Good night (5849) Bad night (638) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse http://tfl.nu/je2y
  Replies (160) Good night (11272) Bad night (1059)