Texts From Last Night

vickytoria's Favorites Texts:

Sort By: Date Favorited / Date Posted / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  i dont think thats healthy man...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful. (303): i dont think thats healthy man... http://tfl.nu/vurl
  Replies (6) Good night (2122) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you" http://tfl.nu/nnn7
  Replies (1) Good night (2293) Bad night (538) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on. http://tfl.nu/cjzk
  Replies (4) Good night (3201) Bad night (558) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life. http://tfl.nu/jc0t
  Replies (15) Good night (3167) Bad night (652) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes. http://tfl.nu/9iko
  Replies (118) Good night (26864) Bad night (4285) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower. http://tfl.nu/hbb7
  Replies (62) Good night (19378) Bad night (1456) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort. http://tfl.nu/ivbh
  Replies (71) Good night (19588) Bad night (1794) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises. http://tfl.nu/lren
  Replies (67) Good night (19689) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back http://tfl.nu/kyt1
  Replies (181) Good night (21272) Bad night (891) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy." http://tfl.nu/a1we
  Replies (91) Good night (21443) Bad night (2995) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp. http://tfl.nu/a6do
  Replies (40) Good night (20977) Bad night (981)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever. http://tfl.nu/wzae
  Replies (126) Good night (22950) Bad night (1598) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti http://tfl.nu/zbwe
  Replies (36) Good night (22893) Bad night (1087) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist http://tfl.nu/hzre
  Replies (51) Good night (24078) Bad night (1570) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain. http://tfl.nu/vwtj
  Replies (51) Good night (25351) Bad night (1004) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now http://tfl.nu/39yk
  Replies (82) Good night (26524) Bad night (1384)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.

  (1-661): View more from California

  What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up. (1-661): What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how" http://tfl.nu/sghh
  Replies (50) Good night (29858) Bad night (1107)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome. http://tfl.nu/21pe
  Replies (22) Good night (28709) Bad night (968) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out. http://tfl.nu/gev3
  Replies (508) Good night (86055) Bad night (8367)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed http://tfl.nu/sznd
  Replies (127) Good night (127057) Bad night (2828) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba" http://tfl.nu/uoap
  Replies (833) Good night (142117) Bad night (9305) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again. http://tfl.nu/1ovr
  Replies (5) Good night (807) Bad night (1212) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.

  (1-604): View more from British Columbia

  please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper. (1-604): please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night. http://tfl.nu/j80d
  Replies (11) Good night (5261) Bad night (963) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer," http://tfl.nu/po39
  Replies (6) Good night (2621) Bad night (469) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk. http://tfl.nu/8nn3
  Replies (14) Good night (3300) Bad night (764) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw. http://tfl.nu/90j8
  Replies (6) Good night (2908) Bad night (1076) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.

  (1-707): View more from California

  is that even a sentence?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina. (1-707): is that even a sentence? http://tfl.nu/j6fd
  Replies (13) Good night (3082) Bad night (887) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you? http://tfl.nu/6gws
  Replies (4) Good night (3247) Bad night (597) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (407): You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear. http://tfl.nu/lhty
  Replies (4) Good night (3145) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year. http://tfl.nu/jiz9
  Replies (12) Good night (3754) Bad night (796) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago. http://tfl.nu/0eob
  Replies (16) Good night (4279) Bad night (1022) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life. http://tfl.nu/pccz
  Replies (9) Good night (6098) Bad night (883) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors http://tfl.nu/t3jz
  Replies (11) Good night (5059) Bad night (693) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there. http://tfl.nu/44mo
  Replies (12) Good night (6879) Bad night (889) Order T-Shirt