Texts From Last Night · peterboy's Favorites

peterboy's Favorites Texts:

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(720): View more from Colorado

o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket

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(720): o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket http://tfl.nu/nqxt

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.

(1-973): View more from New Jersey

Guess she heard her killer coming

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(973): I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear. (1-973): Guess she heard her killer coming http://tfl.nu/u45m

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(802): View more from Vermont

OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.

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(802): OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made. http://tfl.nu/87yq

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(330): View more from Ohio

First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down

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(330): First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down http://tfl.nu/yeuq

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(404): View more from Georgia

i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".

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(404): i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ". http://tfl.nu/tf5y

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(857): View more from Massachusetts

seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.

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(857): seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable. http://tfl.nu/zho9

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(843): View more from South Carolina

the red head has a bf

(1-843): View more from South Carolina

just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score

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(843): the red head has a bf (1-843): just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score http://tfl.nu/bdta

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(541): View more from Oregon

So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward

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(541): So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward http://tfl.nu/dpap

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.

(508): View more from Massachusetts

i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.

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(617): i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend. (508): i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me. http://tfl.nu/ho6s

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(315): View more from New York

i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love

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(315): i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love http://tfl.nu/v9ss

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(757): View more from Virginia

At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."

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(757): At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP." http://tfl.nu/p091

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(813): View more from Florida

I'm fucking your sister right now.

(1-813): View more from Florida

You motherfucker

(813): View more from Florida

She's next.

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(813): I'm fucking your sister right now. (1-813): You motherfucker (813): She's next. http://tfl.nu/gaup

Replies (152) Good night (65387) Bad night (3436)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.

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(203): I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter. http://tfl.nu/8kyg

Replies (289) Good night (62255) Bad night (4267)
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(541): View more from Oregon

my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests

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(541): my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests http://tfl.nu/dcsh

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(847): View more from Illinois

I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.

(1-847): View more from Illinois

How was it?

(847): View more from Illinois

Fantastic, but that's not the point.

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(847): I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me. (1-847): How was it? (847): Fantastic, but that's not the point. http://tfl.nu/muuk

Replies (204) Good night (86452) Bad night (7099)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I would do horrible things to your vagina.

(978): View more from Massachusetts

Prove it.

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(617): I would do horrible things to your vagina. (978): Prove it. http://tfl.nu/qld3

Replies (182) Good night (93468) Bad night (4595)
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(909): View more from California

I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him

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(909): I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him http://tfl.nu/axwb

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(519): View more from Ontario

and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"

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(519): and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba" http://tfl.nu/uoap

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...

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(774): i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"... http://tfl.nu/2wkl

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(917): View more from New York City

And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.

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(917): And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating. http://tfl.nu/qged

Replies (19) Good night (5581) Bad night (1472) Order T-Shirt

peterboy's Favorites Texts:

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