My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
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i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
You're right, stupid question.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well