Texts From Last Night · ohbummerrr's Favorites

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ohbummerrr's Favorites Texts:

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(415): View more from California

how hairy? two words: wookie tits

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick

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(334): View more from Alabama

If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes

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(631): View more from New York

youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.

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(586): View more from Michigan

I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.

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(309): View more from Illinois

It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.

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