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  • 85 50
    Submitted by NotAnonymous321 on Apr 15, 11 at 1:52pm

    Did you remember to take the apple pie out of your pocket?

  • 73 40
    Submitted by rapunzel198677 on Apr 21, 11 at 2:29am

    That's one good night lol

  • 72 44
    Submitted by shamrock2112 on Apr 16, 11 at 4:42pm

    That was me trying to wake you before my mom came home.

  • 74 55
    Submitted by jasonstraka on Apr 17, 11 at 11:26am

    You probably faked it.

  • 76 61
    Submitted by Patrick on Apr 15, 11 at 11:53pm

    That was Jesus giving you a facial.

  • 60 44
    Submitted by babykarma2005 on Apr 15, 11 at 1:59pm

    must have been real bad sex if it didn't fall while u were fucking

  • 69 63
    Submitted by SALIA on Apr 16, 11 at 5:27am

    Wow, you have low standards.

  • 68 70
    Submitted by Anonymous1024 on Apr 15, 11 at 5:58pm

    You passed out, then the jack fell on your face? Did the glass hit you on the face to wake you up?

  • 59 58
    Submitted by StankyBritches52 on Apr 15, 11 at 6:13pm

    jack daniels is disgusting...drink good whiskey, not that shit

  • 64 69
    Submitted by Pernski on Apr 15, 11 at 1:54pm

    Lmao 2 bad texts make a good one