Texts From Last Night

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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists

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  (902): We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club (902): The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists http://tfl.nu/vl5e
  Replies (5) Good night (987) Bad night (210)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...

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  (613): Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches... http://tfl.nu/4xud
  Replies (9) Good night (811) Bad night (225)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?

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  (202): Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina? http://tfl.nu/ofgw
  Replies (6) Good night (494) Bad night (259) Order T-Shirt
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition

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  (989): tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition http://tfl.nu/yo0y
  Replies (2) Good night (747) Bad night (249) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES

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  (+61): IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES http://tfl.nu/noxs
  Replies (6) Good night (731) Bad night (198) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'll be there in a few.

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'M COUNTING TO FEW.

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  (814): I'll be there in a few. (717): I'M COUNTING TO FEW. http://tfl.nu/nvfq
  Replies (5) Good night (832) Bad night (156)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin

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  (717): In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin http://tfl.nu/u60j
  Replies (5) Good night (671) Bad night (198) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight

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  (214): Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight http://tfl.nu/391k
  Replies (5) Good night (741) Bad night (212) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?

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  (512): I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day? http://tfl.nu/bpfn
  Replies (4) Good night (821) Bad night (218) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.

  (614): View more from Ohio

  That d should have definitely been an s.

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  (614): I just watched my mom get dick on Skype. (614): That d should have definitely been an s. http://tfl.nu/dkna
  Replies (9) Good night (948) Bad night (506)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.

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  (904): I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends. http://tfl.nu/6wle
  Replies (3) Good night (754) Bad night (179) Order T-Shirt
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  (551): View more from New Jersey

  No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.

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  (551): No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours. http://tfl.nu/8sve
  Replies (4) Good night (1004) Bad night (137) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler

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  (615): And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler http://tfl.nu/itqd
  Replies (5) Good night (218) Bad night (817) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.

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  (706): He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex. http://tfl.nu/pzxj
  Replies (5) Good night (1643) Bad night (212) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.

  (619): View more from California

  he what???

  (760): View more from California

  Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.

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  (760): He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came. (619): he what??? (760): Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans. http://tfl.nu/7sag
  Replies (6) Good night (1777) Bad night (180)
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  (928): View more from Arizona

  It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".

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  (928): It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams". http://tfl.nu/l9ee
  Replies (6) Good night (365) Bad night (729)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer

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  (604): Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer http://tfl.nu/ixyo
  Replies (7) Good night (233) Bad night (911) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.

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  (603): trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment. (603): naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS. http://tfl.nu/yhfs
  Replies (5) Good night (1724) Bad night (216)
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  (559): View more from California

  I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?

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  (559): I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day? http://tfl.nu/b9nt
  Replies (182) Good night (21111) Bad night (2643) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"

  (1-858): View more from California

  next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.

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  (858): Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him" (1-858): next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective. http://tfl.nu/n75w
  Replies (2) Good night (879) Bad night (208)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question

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  (336): Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question http://tfl.nu/9vj8
  Replies (12) Good night (1313) Bad night (244) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.

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  (+44): You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality. http://tfl.nu/86pw
  Replies (4) Good night (779) Bad night (294) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET

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  (425): Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET http://tfl.nu/8n1t
  Replies (5) Good night (734) Bad night (324) Order T-Shirt
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  (954): View more from Florida

  She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering

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  (954): She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering http://tfl.nu/ujc0
  Replies (6) Good night (461) Bad night (598) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.

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  (614): I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win. http://tfl.nu/v96e
  Replies (3) Good night (866) Bad night (161) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  You is good. You is important. You is a slut.

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  (678): You is good. You is important. You is a slut. http://tfl.nu/0cr6
  Replies (8) Good night (1357) Bad night (524) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.

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  (206): He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober. http://tfl.nu/q7n9
  Replies (7) Good night (756) Bad night (283) Order T-Shirt
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?

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  (515): I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king? http://tfl.nu/4eun
  Replies (5) Good night (1131) Bad night (236) Order T-Shirt