Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
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There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
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I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"