Texts From Last Night

blamblam's Favorites Texts:

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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?

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  (775): Why is the garage door in the middle of the street? http://tfl.nu/rc41
  Replies (13) Good night (4041) Bad night (1391) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism

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  (651): Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism http://tfl.nu/8f4x
  Replies (4) Good night (3261) Bad night (767) Order T-Shirt
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now

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  (318): I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now http://tfl.nu/xdsb
  Replies (15) Good night (5429) Bad night (1488) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.

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  (703): just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking. http://tfl.nu/uhxv
  Replies (15) Good night (1495) Bad night (5038) Order T-Shirt
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  (909): View more from California

  The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."

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  (909): The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling." http://tfl.nu/73er
  Replies (20) Good night (8531) Bad night (1230) Order T-Shirt
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.

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  (864): I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you. http://tfl.nu/pv7t
  Replies (11) Good night (7291) Bad night (957) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM

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  (516): OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM http://tfl.nu/ckuz
  Replies (34) Good night (7764) Bad night (1626) Order T-Shirt
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!

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  (231): I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers! http://tfl.nu/0unq
  Replies (28) Good night (6289) Bad night (1311) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"

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  (315): I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy" http://tfl.nu/ekfn
  Replies (9) Good night (1331) Bad night (3773) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.

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  (817): I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented. http://tfl.nu/9hus
  Replies (25) Good night (8670) Bad night (854) Order T-Shirt
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  (281): View more from Texas

  She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.

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  (281): She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this. http://tfl.nu/u3zd
  Replies (46) Good night (9954) Bad night (1204)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!

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  (913): I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?! http://tfl.nu/fugu
  Replies (67) Good night (1789) Bad night (4430) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??

  (1-925): View more from California

  Yes. Yes it is.

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  (925): Is snow just God skeeting all over the place?? (1-925): Yes. Yes it is. http://tfl.nu/ofba
  Replies (12) Good night (4203) Bad night (1634) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  She's like the pied piper of lesbians.

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  (405): She's like the pied piper of lesbians. http://tfl.nu/2bl6
  Replies (13) Good night (3519) Bad night (908) Order T-Shirt
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake

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  (740): I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake http://tfl.nu/bl2k
  Replies (42) Good night (8676) Bad night (1175) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.

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  (508): she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it. http://tfl.nu/mcxs
  Replies (38) Good night (1457) Bad night (7052) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.

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  (509): Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup. http://tfl.nu/26kw
  Replies (14) Good night (1272) Bad night (5462) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.

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  (617): He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up. http://tfl.nu/h2lf
  Replies (23) Good night (8039) Bad night (4805) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top

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  (405): New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top http://tfl.nu/zi79
  Replies (257) Good night (8205) Bad night (2227) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  is drinking for groundhog day legit?

  (1-484): View more from Pennsylvania

  well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes

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  (484): is drinking for groundhog day legit? (1-484): well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes http://tfl.nu/k04d
  Replies (21) Good night (6088) Bad night (529) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.

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  (203): Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet. http://tfl.nu/z4ao
  Replies (24) Good night (7393) Bad night (1522) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town

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  (757): Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town http://tfl.nu/mvuo
  Replies (39) Good night (6647) Bad night (735) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face

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  (856): my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face http://tfl.nu/f36p
  Replies (3) Good night (1037) Bad night (3314) Order T-Shirt
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  (562): View more from California

  Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar

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  (562): Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar http://tfl.nu/ilql
  Replies (6) Good night (675) Bad night (2183) Order T-Shirt
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work

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  (719): I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work http://tfl.nu/axgl
  Replies (14) Good night (3504) Bad night (756) Order T-Shirt