Texts From Last Night

2stnd2care's Favorites Texts:

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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?

  (1-250): View more from British Columbia

  tequila

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  (250): do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub? (1-250): tequila http://tfl.nu/yi12
  Replies (12) Good night (5093) Bad night (434) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  You guys make me sad

  (703): View more from Virginia

  You misspelled jealous there

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  (703): We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone. (540): You guys make me sad (703): You misspelled jealous there http://tfl.nu/wtst
  Replies (23) Good night (11496) Bad night (1195)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.

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  (856): I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch. http://tfl.nu/64iu
  Replies (28) Good night (4839) Bad night (876) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.

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  (256): Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green. http://tfl.nu/6tsm
  Replies (25) Good night (6493) Bad night (761) Order T-Shirt
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".

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  (270): The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard". http://tfl.nu/w1c8
  Replies (19) Good night (6705) Bad night (882) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him

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  (303): Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him http://tfl.nu/pmln
  Replies (11) Good night (2195) Bad night (1073) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"

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  (219): U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus" http://tfl.nu/8y4p
  Replies (12) Good night (3747) Bad night (711) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.

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  (707): She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love. http://tfl.nu/is4u
  Replies (17) Good night (4552) Bad night (779) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."

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  (248): Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth." http://tfl.nu/c9w9
  Replies (15) Good night (7581) Bad night (626) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

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  (215): i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section http://tfl.nu/5gr0
  Replies (1628) Good night (168227) Bad night (42146) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down

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  (330): First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down http://tfl.nu/yeuq
  Replies (206) Good night (51678) Bad night (2730) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.

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  (724): Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted. http://tfl.nu/tz2e
  Replies (41) Good night (16607) Bad night (2163) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.

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  (425): I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B. http://tfl.nu/2oen
  Replies (38) Good night (4935) Bad night (1870) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.

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  (479): You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money. http://tfl.nu/ged1
  Replies (5) Good night (3967) Bad night (557) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.

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  (860): There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now. http://tfl.nu/p8mk
  Replies (6) Good night (3147) Bad night (721) Order T-Shirt
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  just found the deal breaker

  (1-251): View more from Alabama

  hairy back?

  (251): View more from Alabama

  he can't live within 1000 ft of a school

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  (251): just found the deal breaker (1-251): hairy back? (251): he can't live within 1000 ft of a school http://tfl.nu/kwkd
  Replies (73) Good night (866) Bad night (14109)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.

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  (503): My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/4mwl
  Replies (18) Good night (4770) Bad night (1911) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.

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  (845): Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there. http://tfl.nu/s3qt
  Replies (22) Good night (3868) Bad night (826) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'd give my left nut to see you

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  don't do that. I like the set

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  (724): I'd give my left nut to see you (609): don't do that. I like the set http://tfl.nu/41nb
  Replies (12) Good night (9633) Bad night (660)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.

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  (604): I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks. http://tfl.nu/kxma
  Replies (34) Good night (2123) Bad night (2503)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?

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  (765): So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head? http://tfl.nu/senf
  Replies (31) Good night (7459) Bad night (471) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Fuck. Wron person. But yea

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  (770): Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex (404): Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut (770): Fuck. Wron person. But yea http://tfl.nu/bsak
  Replies (26) Good night (1707) Bad night (3389)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.

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  (732): Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million. http://tfl.nu/4jbr
  Replies (25) Good night (906) Bad night (4006) Order T-Shirt