Texts From Last Night · monie's Favorites

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monie's Favorites Texts:

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"

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(520): View more from Arizona

Have you been tested recently?

(1-520): View more from Arizona

Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune

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(260): View more from Indiana

spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(202): View more from Washington, DC

Quick, to the slutcave!

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(714): View more from California

Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.

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(208): View more from Idaho

I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.

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(626): View more from California

Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.

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