he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
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there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.