Texts From Last Night · jmg1985's Favorites

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jmg1985's Favorites Texts:

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(281): View more from Texas

WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!

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(949): View more from California

you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.

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(303): View more from Colorado

She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(815): View more from Illinois

She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!

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(425): View more from Washington

i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house

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(407): View more from Florida

Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?

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