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I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
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