Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five