Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
And then the night went full on bisexual.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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