The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
