the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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