Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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