i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
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