sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
