Yo dont text me then not text me
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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