then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
