i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
