Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...