So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
