The brown eye won't let me do that either.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Randomize