i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Blow job season was short but glorious.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize