I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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