I'm really into asian looking animals
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Randomize
