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  • come on, TFLN. i ALSO got the chain email.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:22pm
  • Definitely fake; I got that same e-mail two days ago. Funny shit spreads like wildfire.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:22pm
  • Thank you 2:38... That's been pointed out a hundred times

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:42pm
  • This isn't a text from last night. It's a random thought. My friend sent me an email the other day with a bunch of random thoughts and thus was one of them. Haha. .....it is funny though.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:14pm
  • i concur. do you live in Pittsburgh?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 10:03pm
  • Fuck all of you. You're the reason more people don't ride bikes. Seriously, give cyclists some respect. At least they're using their own power.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:31pm
  • yeah i definitely saw this in random thoughts on facebook.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:24pm
  • Maybe cyclists HAVE the same laws as automobiles, but they sure as hell don't obey them.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:25pm
  • This is the exact reason I have a CCW and carry with me every single time I ride my bike. I learned that lesson after getting hit in the head by a glass bottle thrown out the car window by a douchebag just like you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:53pm
  • couldn't agree more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:10pm
  • This is from a chain email... I received the same one earlier... FAKE

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:13pm
  • has anybody pointed out that the chain email/FB post this came from had several MUCH funnier things than this stupid thing about cyclists?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:56pm
  • Hahahahahahahaha! Word!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 1:52am
  • i couldnt agree more....cyclists take up half the damn road cant do more than 10 mph... and feel the need to drive on busy ass roads... i hate you all cyclists

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 10:22pm
  • This couldn't be more true. I absolutely hate whrn I'm driving and I see a bicycle on the road, slowing off traffic lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 10:07am
  • all you people who hate on cyclist maybe you should TRY it one time.. ride on a busy freaking road and try NOT to get hit by a car... people think its easy to ride on a sidewalk, but ride on a road bike, there is no suspension, we can not get off a curb easy.. so please try riding a road bike on a road before you judge... thanks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:19pm
  • I hate cyclists too. I think about this txt every time I see one and lol

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 22, 09 at 10:24pm
  • At least that fixie shit is dying, they're the worst

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 9:01pm
  • and as a cyclist I hate you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 11:55pm
  • well what if hes in a bike?...

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:14pm
  • 580 people standing up for the poor cyclists!!! Wah wah wah!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 12:37pm
  • If you think it's funny, check out Aaron Karo. He's the one who originally said this in one of his ruminations.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:09pm
  • whether it's fake or not i totally agree!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:30pm
  • @ 2:15 Bikes can't follow the same laws as automobiles. So you want to sit behind a cyclist going 15 mph on a no-passing road with a speed limit of 35? Bikes shouldn't be considered automobiles. Cyclists are closer to pedestrians than they are to automobiles. And fuck you, cyclists are responsible for only about 10% of cyclist-automobile accidents. If you can't figure out how to drive with a cyclist on the road, you probably shouldn't be driving.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:28pm
  • Why expand a road to add a bike lane an ban bikes on the side walk when a bike does not meet min safety standards cars must to\nBe on that road. Why not expand the sidewalk and add a bike lane there and ban bikes from\nThe roads?

    Submitted by Squarewheel on Apr 15, 11 at 4:55pm
  • @3:35.. moron, in most states cyclists are not allowed by law to ride on the sidewalk. it's more dangerous with intersections and driveways, etc. and if you really hope someone riding from point a to point b on a bicycle gets hit, then.. well.. fuck you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:41pm
  • Second time I've seen this. Weak

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:41pm
  • vehicular cycling, retards

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 31, 09 at 2:21pm
  • a friend of mine was killed by a driver while riding his bike, i don't find this funny at all.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 4:16pm
  • same this is fake. its a chain letter "random thoughts" thing. super funny, but please don't try to coin someone else's real wit as your own. kthanks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 8:55pm
  • yeah, they share them, they dont follow them. Oh i'm cycling up a slight hill to a stop sign, well, if i stop it'll be hard to get going again, i'll just go through it. etc.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:23pm
  • I hate cyclists they either think they own the road or the path so next time one tries to fuck u off just stick out ur arm n clothesline the fucker! ;-)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 8:38pm
  • I agree, except when I am a cyclist, I hate drivers and pedestrians. Did you know as a cyclist you can report cars that honk at you or try to drive you off the road? Although I will say, if you are a cyclist who ignores the rules of the road, then you deserve what you get. You can't ignore stop signs and red light, you can't go the wrong way down a one way street, you can't cross intersections with peds.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:28pm
  • Your moral highground is one of the things I hate most about you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 5:17pm
  • Cyclists, stop talking shit. We're sorry you cant afford cars like us. Newsflash: no matter how hard you try, youll never be a car. Get off the roads, its not our fault if you get hit, its yours for being broke when you couldve been American.

    Submitted by PurpleKush420 on Aug 14, 10 at 4:57pm
  • fatass, might do you some good to hop on a bike

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 6:58pm
  • Suck my big fat cock all you hick/non cyclists. Cars are fucking death on wheels.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 5:13pm
  • this is from ruminations

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:46pm
  • still a good point. I'll share the road with bicyclists when they start sharing the same laws as automobiles.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:15pm
  • Fuck that...I'd hit a biker any day...abide by traffic laws and the speed limit or get on the goddamn sidewalk

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 7, 09 at 9:56pm
  • This text is soo true. I live in a suburban/country area. There a group of about ten cyclists who ride together, usually at rush hour, which is absolutely stupid. And there's nowhere to pass them since our roads around here are so windy. Go ride bikes in a damn state park or something.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:23pm
  • well good, because I hate you too! Many cyclists DO follow the same rules as cars. Of course some don't, just like some of drivers go around drunkenly smashing into things. The difference is, cyclists are much more likely to get injured in a collision.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:28pm
  • i when some jackass in a car yells at me to ride on the sidewalk. by law in my state (and in most) cyclists can't ride on the sidewalk. and even if they could, it's far more dangerous than riding in the road. learn the laws and learn how to drive with cyclists and maybe you won't be so easily frustrated..

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:05pm
  • yeaa definitely got this in a chain e-mail today. lame.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:37pm
  • Yea well bikes save the world from pollution so suck gently on my right nut while I pop a load on ya face

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:27pm
  • Oh my god. That is exactly how I feel.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 26, 09 at 12:09am
  • oops.. i meant i *love* it when

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:05pm
  • Or my BLATANT spelling error. Ha-ha!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 6:37pm
  • This is fake. I saw the quote on an iPhone app.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 2:58am
  • This is an old quote

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 2:52am
  • While we cyclists can find consolation in the fact that the petty insults you fling can never reach our moral highground, you drivers can find it in the fact that you ARE actively smothering us all to death, cyclists, pedestrians, AND yourselves. Good job! Now that that's settled, let's talk about the real a-holes... drivers who gripe about second hand smoke!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 5:14pm
  • I hate it when there is a full open sidewalk and these fucks are riding on the road. Its so stupid I hope they get hit. They think they are some sort of car or something.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:35pm
  • Me too. Including when I'm cycling.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 30, 09 at 11:54am
  • It's really not that hard to pass a cyclist in a car

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:16pm
  • dear god. You all are morons. Can you imagine if all the cyclists started obeying the driving laws? Traffic would be perpetually stuck at 15- 20 mph. Good job on being retarded.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:31pm
  • its from an e-mail chain but that doesnt mean it still cant be sent thru a text

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 16, 09 at 9:27am
  • This is from a email going around. I say boo sir. Boo to you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 6:10pm
  • youre in connecticut, please die promptly and include ilana klein with you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:54pm
  • who's more dangerous? bicycle messenger? asshole in a 2,000 pound hunk of gas and metal? hmmm

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:25pm
  • Fuck cyclists, share the road my ass, use the sidewalk

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 3, 09 at 9:05pm
  • Fuck this shit. Cyclists have just as much of a right to be on the road. It's far more dangerous for them to be on the sidewalk anyway.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 4, 09 at 7:44pm
  • seriously. bicyclists are supposed to stay as far to the right as possible, unless they believe it would be unsafe for a car to pass them. the speed limits obviously don't apply to them.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:22pm
  • 3:34- i'd rather ride my bike and take my chances than ride the slow, shitty buses in this city with their terrible routes and terrifying passengers. no thanks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:43pm
  • This is the most legit statement I've heard in a long time. Cyclists (ESPECIALLY messengers) are in their own little world and are so fucking dangerous on the road. Fuck biking, take public transportation.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:19pm
  • The cyclist law sucks ASS. What collision would you prefer to happen, a cyclist with a car or a pedestrian with a cyclist. Much greater risk for cyclist deaths in the road than pedestrian deaths on the sidewalk.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:27pm
  • Oh this is all awesomely hilarious.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:34pm
  • this isn't real anyway. it's circulating on an email.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:38pm
  • Every smalltown ct resident feels the same way.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Oct 11, 09 at 7:16pm
  • dont worry weather you are a driver, or a pedestrian, cyclists hate you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:24pm
  • I couldn't agree more 2:23

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:30pm
  • they do share the same laws as automobiles, Idiot.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:18pm
  • and I hate your mom. she doesn't make breakfast in the morning before I leave.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 5:16pm
  • hey, they still could have texted the email bit to someone who then put it on here. CHILL PEOPLE

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:28pm
  • When a cyclist can do the speed limit on whatever road they are on, they may share the road. Until then, find somewhere else to ride.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:48pm
  • I'm a messenger. All you drivers suck my balls.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:18pm
  • yeah, fuck cyclists. lance armstrong suck. what a doushebag. he should've stayed off the roads. then he might not have gotten nut cancer

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:01pm
  • in the 860 this couldn't be more true, mass groups of cyclists who refuse to ride in a straight line when a car goes by

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:10pm
  • the only way to get something posted on here is for it to be fake! half the crap on here is fake! dont get so serious about TFLN idiots. get a life

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 31, 09 at 2:46pm
  • ...And your perceptiveness and sense of humor are what I like most about you.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 5:29pm
  • Ten points if you hit one. Bonus points if you make him fly.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:10pm
  • I got hitbya guy riding a bike once as a pedestrian. If my backpack hadn't broken my fall I probably would've died. So yes, cyclists can go fuck themselves, I was following my rules.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 9:54pm
  • YES! God, they're the worst, aren't they?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 8:58pm
  • 3:25 - I've ridden a bike in the city and I'll never do it again because its so FUCKING dangerous. In the last three years I've been five bicyclists get killed on the intersection where I work, and every time it's been deemed their fault because they weren't following the rules of the road. And if you're in a city, public transit is always an option.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:34pm
  • Cyclists are cunts FTW

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 2:54am
  • Awesome. Copied from an email.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 5, 09 at 10:19pm
  • i def read this on a "random thoughts email" people really dont think for themselves antmore

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:37pm
  • i dont have a problem with cyclists who know what they are doing. but i feel like a lot of people dont. I cant tell you how many times i've had a cyclist just cut in front of me, or continue down the middle of the street in front of me making it impossible for me to get around them. All the power to you if you want to ride your bike, i'm all for saving the environment and such. BUT LEARN HOW TO RIDE YOUR DAMN BIKE FIRST!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 2:20am
  • Cyclists are losers. Get off the road unless you can go the speed limit. It takes a lot of will power to avoid hitting those pricks with my car. "But we don't pollute and contribute to greenhouse gases blah blah blah" Take your "global warming" garbage back to the fiction section where it belongs.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 2, 09 at 2:36pm
  • 3 FEET MOTHERFUCKER!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 29, 09 at 3:28pm
  • fake or not, way to be a jackass... cyclists have as much right to be on the road as the cars

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 11:34pm
  • This was stolen from various chain letters, where it was originally stolen from Aaron Karo's website, Ruminations.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 17, 09 at 3:02am
  • Not original. I read this in an article online last week.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 9:02pm
  • You're from Connecticut so I probably hate you. This sucks.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:44pm
  • As a cyclist I hate pedestrians and drivers, as a pedestrian I hate drivers and cyclists, and as a driver I hate everyone.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 30, 09 at 12:57pm
  • Fake. Also, what you cyclists don't know is that motorists secretly WANT to kill you. Sure we act all horrified and remorseful in court and in front of your families, but we secretly award points and high five each other with every cyclist we claim. Live strong!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 4:41pm
  • This was in a forwarded email; not a very original thought.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 2:10pm
  • i'm glad so many people knew this from the random thoughts thing circulating on fb/emails...and only 2 other people give credit to aaron karo and ruminations. it and all the other random thoughts are from his site.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 5:02pm
  • I've also ridden across the country, Washington state to Maine. If you hate bikes, and the people riding them, you are ignorant and selfish. Every state I've been to on a bike has a Share the Road law. I stay to the right as far as possible, and try to make sure cars are allowed the space they need to travel at normal speeds and safe speeds. When I'm driving and I see guys riding 3 wide blocking the whole lane, I yell at them. It's everyone's responsibility to share the road and use it wisely.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 31, 09 at 1:58pm
  • 3:19 : no, cyclists are NOT in their own little world. have you ever ridden a bike in a city before?! it takes a lot more concentration, attention and quick reflexes to cycle. public transit isn't always an option.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:25pm
  • as a cyclist, driver and pedestrian...i just hate everyone.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Nov 24, 09 at 8:06pm
  • i'm a cyclist and drivers and pedestrians are both fucking retarded. i spend most of my time shouting "GO FASTER!" at cars and pedestrians assume i'm going really slowly and step out in front. i will agree that most other cyclists on the roads are also fucking retarded. i don't cycle on the pavement but people who do piss me off. i think i just hate everyone!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Sep 18, 09 at 10:43am
  • @3:25 so true.. public transportation is simply not an option in my city. but it's scary to ride bikes here. i have many friends who have been hit by drunk drivers. i was almost hit by a drunk lady one night when she ran a red light and then a stop sign. i caught up to her at the liquor store a few blocks down and called the cops on her. she belligerently told me that cyclists have no place on the road because there would always be drunk drivers like her out there.. nice logic.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Aug 28, 09 at 3:31pm
  • damn straight

    Submitted by gabeg14 on Jan 31, 11 at 1:29am
  • hate cyclists, an hate dudes who try to use that they ride bikes like its a super power to try to get chicks to fuck them. all it announces to me is that your dick prob doesnt work from hittin too many bumbs an that your an asshole

    Submitted by kokc1994 on Feb 1, 13 at 2:08am