i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
