We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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