Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
