I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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