he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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