i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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