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  • And the minute ur supposed to 'let product sit before enjoying' can fuck itself.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 1:56am
  • especially when you just got off the bus from school and are waiting for your hot pockets to cook

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:06pm
  • I wouldn't even be surprised if that is scientifically accurate

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:24pm
  • I'm gonna cover my dick with pancake batter and shove it in a waffle iron

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:03pm
  • Especially when you're stoned

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 5:32pm
  • didn't the ancient greeks run around fucking each other in the ass?

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:12pm
  • SO TRUE. Especially the minute you are supposed to let it sit.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 6:57pm
  • This is the first really good TFLN text that i've read in a long time.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 7:37pm
  • Truer words never spoken.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:42pm
  • And are like years in toaster oven time

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 9:12pm
  • so right

    Submitted by thatgirlcarrie on Jan 29, 10 at 10:16pm
  • totally

    Submitted by NerdyVE on Feb 10, 11 at 11:41pm
  • San Diego represent!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:09pm
  • It's because you're in San Diego. Everything happens 3 hours slower in the West, including cooking your food. :)

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 10:18pm
  • One of the best TFLN I've read

    Submitted by TouCH on May 7, 10 at 2:50am
  • Minutes that im fucking your mother in the ass are even longer than microwave minutes

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 4:13am
  • Yea specialy when yo ass is Blazed

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 4:37am
  • No you're just a FATASS!!!!! WOOO FATASSSS!!!!!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 1:37am
  • ahahahaha i love thiis one

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 5, 09 at 12:05am
  • You should submit this as a slogan to Threadless.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:38pm
  • thats so true. its even worse when you can smell whats cooking inside. such a tease.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 12:56am
  • Compare it with a timer and you will see they count down to 0 at exactly the same rate

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 10:11pm
  • I fucking know right fuck the nuck box

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 10, 09 at 9:21pm
  • 6:29 do NOT pose soviet Russia guy! Only he is amazing

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 9:15am
  • You know what's also longer than normal mintues? Football minutes.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 10:20pm
  • Haha I totally agree

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 4:38pm
  • omfg your a genius and im not crazy your so right and when your hammered microwave minutes are deff longer nice one man

    Submitted by dave_mansfield on May 14, 10 at 5:34pm
  • this is so true! me and my roomate agree

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 10:58am
  • It's like you read my mind 11:39

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 12:39am
  • hahahaha the san diego ones are so funny! cant wait to be home for break:D

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 7, 09 at 7:26pm
  • yeah they do that purposely to fuck with you when you're starving.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 9:31pm
  • True story. Stupid microwaves.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 6:03pm
  • It certainly does feel like they are. But only when watching them or are on a work break.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 8, 09 at 7:11pm
  • yeah by like 4 seconds!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 3:12pm
  • Stay fatty San Diego <3

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 3:37am
  • In Soviet Russia, microwave minutes are longer than you

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 6:29am
  • Dude that's sooo fucking true hahaha

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 30, 09 at 3:02am
  • Calm down shamoo... Try not to bite your finger off eating you're tv dinner. Mabye quit worrying so much about eating and spend more time with your boyfriend. Just sayin'

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 4, 09 at 2:49am
  • especially hot pockets and pot pies, WAIT, ramen noodles:D yummy

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 11:39pm
  • True!! Finally a good tfln!!

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 8:14pm
  • YEAH especially when you heating up ky jelly..!! Ohhh yeah get it up to 450 degrees!!then slather it all over your cock till it sizzles!!!!!!! ........then fuck

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 10:28pm
  • Best tfln in a long time. See, kids? That's how you do it: be funny and original. Hint: yet another "you were so drunk last night you..." has very very little chance of being original or funny.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 8:47pm
  • stolen from ruminations

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 16, 09 at 3:17pm
  • I know, the mixroware takes away the" only takes two minutes to make".

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 9:22pm
  • Fuck you 3:09 PHI KAPPA PSI

    Submitted by Anonymous on Dec 3, 09 at 3:09pm
  • If they still teach home economics in schools (especially if it's the cooking part, as kids do need to learn to make their own food and not depend on take-out and freezer meals), that should be lesson one.

    Submitted by RazorTongue on Sep 18, 15 at 8:17pm