I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
